WHO IS IN YOUR CIRCLE?

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 “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” 

Have you heard this before?

If you want to level up in life, business, and relationships, you have to look at your circle.

Some of the most brutal sacrifices that I have had to make have been in assessing my circles.

Now, I am ABSOLUTELY NOT part of this “cancel culture.”  Nope! But when speaking of circles, it is all the areas of access and all forms of access.  

Circle:  "TV and media."  What we consume is what we become. Have you assessed the TV shows, streaming shows, or other forms of media you consume? Does it leave you feeling drained, defeated, or defensive? 

Here is an unintentional defense for most social media apps. You can ‘unfollow’ a person without unfriending them.  Yet I have noticed another form of the “cancel culture.” “I’m coming off Facebook because there is nothing but junk on it.” Really, have you gotten rid of your TV, Netflix or Hulu because of the junk on it? No, you take personal responsibility for what you feed your mind with, and you push the button, change the channel or say, “Alexia turn on ….” 

Circle: "Biz friends and relationships."  Networking groups, online groups that compliment or share a common interest or the same industry are great!  But, if you find yourself in a group that you feel you’ve simply outgrown, then it is okay to excuse yourself. Spend your time with people who encourage you and who you feel you can support right back, without it feeling heavy or competitive.

Circle: “Friendship Inner Circle” Make a list of each person you would consider to be an “inner circle friend.” Beside each person’s name, write how they make you feel when you are with them. Is there anyone from who you dread getting texts? Is there anyone who makes you feel defensive or like you have to justify everything you do? The goal here is to identify who lights you up, who leaves you feeling like a million bucks, and who completely vibes with when you.  

Now the hard part: Letting people go. 

Sometimes you have to sacrifice close contact with people when they ended up feeling toxic, heavy, or out of alignment with you.  Again, NOT the cancel culture! All relationships have a purpose, some for you to grow in and some for others to grow in. 

However, relationships that feel draining aren’t my thing anymore.  Especially when I have friends who love me, support me, and it feels like the easiest thing in the world. I think that’s what true friendship should look and feel like — no matter what “circle” they are in.

Whatever your circles look like, make sure everyone who gets to be near you deserves to be near you. Make sure you’re giving as much as you’re taking.  


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